Yes this is ME!!!

So I must confess, I am not really comfortable posting my photograph on WordPress. Talking about all this personal stuff is really hard. So one day when I am ready, I will share my face with all of you. However, I want to share with you all the difference a month and a half can do if you stay focused on your goal. You all know I did the detox to help me with my infertility issues. In the process I have lost 18 pounds. The photo on the left is me at Niagara Falls July of 2013. The photo on the right was taken on September 7th 2013. I have a bit more to go, but I have my eye on the prize.

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I couldn’t believe it when I was creating this before and after. I am a firm believer in believing in yourself and staying determined. Keep your eye on the prize.

One step closer to my goal…….To becoming a mother…..God willing, one day!!!

Sending you all positive vibes xo

 

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You Ask, I Tell!

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Hello my friends,

I have said it many times through out my blog that I am very open to answering any questions based on my experiences with this journey through infertility. I reviewed many questions and most I have answered through direct message. One question in particular is trending at the moment so I decided share my answer with everyone, including you Alex 🙂  (hope you don’t mind)

Alex @ sailingonunchartedwaters.wordpress.com asks:

“Did you follow a specific plan – like from a book or something? What was the hardest part – and what did you do if/when you were super hungry? LOL”

My Answer:

I followed a detox called DETOXY FEMME. It was a pill based detox that I got at the nutrition store. (Review previous posts to see details of the detox). The dietary restrictions were outlined in the instructions of this detox. The restrictions included the following: No sugar in any form (including fruits), no dairy, no carbs, no fermented foods, no mushrooms, no fried foods.

The hardest Part: Giving up SUGAR 😦 OMG it was like withdrawing off of a drug. I couldn’t concentrate, I was cranky, tired, I looked like a zombie for the first week. It got much better by day 7. I started enjoying eating healthier foods. I bought cook books and tried new healthy recipes. It helped because I love to cook so trying new things in the kitchen kept me focused.

What did I do when I got super hungry: I was never really hungry. I still ate good foods. I just learned how to balance my meat and veggies. My diet was two boiled egg whites for breakfast with a cup of black coffee, a glass of water and turkey sausage pan fried in a non stick pan no oil. Lunch would consist of a salad with baked chicken and balsamic vinegar and black pepper, no oil. Dinner would be some sort of veggie combination and a meat: chicken, turkey, beef……… By the second week I was feeling amazing, no more tiredness, sluggishness, or crankiness.

This will sound crazy, but when I was weak and I was craving something sweet, I would SMELL it. I would just go up to the food I wished I could eat and inhaled deeply. For what ever odd reason it did the trick.

Hope this helps and if anyone has any other questions, please feel free to ask away xo

Sending positive vibes to all you beautiful people out there xox

I am Back!!!

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I am back. I am so so sorry I have been out of the loop for so long. It’s not like I was avoiding my amazing followers and viewers, I just had a lot going on. So we left off with me sharing my journey with my detox. I am very proud to share with you all that I have maintained my eating habits and in total I have lost 18 pounds. I am not finished loosing though. I want to continue with this life style change in hopes that one day I can become pregnant, carrying to term a healthy, happy little rugrat that will make me pull my hair out of my head for the next 18 years.

I must say though, having this goal motivates me so much in continuing on with this lifestyle change. I have quit smoking permanently (cold turkey i might add)
I barely have alcohol (a glass of red wine never hurt anyone 🙂 ) and I still eliminate all refined sugars from my diet. I started eating some carbs.. maybe two times a week I will indulge in whole wheat bread or rice. I also try to work out a few times a week. I bike ride when I can and walk up six flights of stairs everyday (to get to my desk) Hey every step leads to a firmer tushy 🙂

So let the journey continue…….I am trying everything I can, with the means that I have to take care of this body in hopes to create life.

Sending you all positive vibes always xxoxoxo

Detox Completed!!!

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Day twenty has finally arrived. Today marks the end of my 20 day detox. What an experience. The first week I felt like death. By the second week I was getting use to the eating better and eliminating all the foods I used to indulge in on a regular basis. The cravings subsided and I started noticing changes in my body. By the third week, my energy level increased and I was settled in having no Carbs, sugar and fried foods. (just to name a few of the dietary restrictions to this detox) I went from drinking a triple triple coffee to drinking it black. I am full of energy and the bonus to it all, I lost 14.5 solid pounds. I feel FANTASTIC! This is one step closer to my goal…..to becoming a mother.

It was so tempting today to splurge on all the foods I have been avoiding for the past 20 days but there was a bit of underlying guilt that discouraged me. I have to keep my head in the game and my eye on the prize. So I refused on splurging on empty calories. And I am glad I did. I love the way I feel. I don’t want to go back to feeling lethargic and sloppy all the time.
I want to continue cleansing my body by eating the right foods. So I have decided to continue on with eating meats and veggies. I will incorporate natural sugars and good carbs into my diet. I am going to also continue working out on a regular basis.

This is one of the hardest things I ever had to do in my life time and I am so grateful to all those who have stuck by me, who have motivated me to continue on with this journey.
And I want to thank all of you who have been following me on this journey and who have been sending their thoughts and well wishes.

Please share this blog with others you know who are tempted to do a similar detox. And if anyone has a fantastic healthy recipe to share with me, I would be ever so grateful.

Product of Circumstance

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“I am not a product of my circumstances. I am a product of my decisions.” –Stephen Covey

This quote spoke to me. I am trying to be more positive and changing my outlook on my situation. Dealing with endometriosis is not easy, and dealing with the issue of being childless is even more hard. For the longest time I was in a deep, dark place. Over the past little while, though encouragement from family and friends I started seeing my situation differently. I started focusing on the positive things I have in my life. And the more I started doing this, the more I started to forget about how rotten and unfulfilled I was feeling. I USED to be a product of my circumstances, a product of infertility, of endometrosis. Not anymore!! God must think we are super strong to have us deal with Inferility. I truly belive his plan is great and in the end, we will have exactly what is meant for us!!!

Culture

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What a fantastic weekend. This weekend was the Scotia Bank Carnival in Toronto. Being born and raised in Toronto and coming from a West Indian background, you can imagine my excitement for this weekends festivities. The parties start from the Thursday night and last until Monday (Today). But the main event was Saturday August 3rd, where the city literally comes alive with the sounds of soca, calypso, reggae, and steel pan music. What a fantastic time, and the food was divine. (Not like I could have indulged in a whole lot due to the detox.)

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As much as I love my culture, I still find myself being stigmatized for those who know that I have fertility issues. As a “girl child”, I am suppose to get married and have children shortly after. ( I do need to make myself clear, this is based solely on my experience. I am not trying to stereotype my entire culture.) Thank heavens my immediate family understands what endometriosis is and the struggle I have faced. But I am still suppose to keep mums about it. Being infertile or having infertility issues is not something you speak about. We don’t let others know because of the ridicule that will fall upon the family. “What wrong with her”, “what did she do”, “god is punishing her.” Oh I have heard it all. I have seen the look of people’s faces especially when I play with their children, its either a look of pity or the look of fear as if I am going to steal their child.

The worst thing about it is that when you see people you haven’t seen in a long time and they ask you “why don’t you have kids yet.” or ” when are the kiddies coming.” How do you answer that questions? How do you get into that conversation without making the other person feel uncomfortable. Remember, infertility is not a topic of discussion.

Knowing that I am stigmatized by some, I am so blessed to have found this blog site. And as scared as I am to contineously open up to the world, I feel like I have found an outlet where I can be free and not judged. I thank you all for your support and not placing me into the category of the sick girl or the abnormal girl who can not have children.

Not the End!

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“Everything is okay in the end, if it’s not ok, then it’s not the end.” (Anonymous)

We need to have faith that no matter how hard our struggle is, we will be ok in the end!

Sending positive vibes to all of you! Xo

Quote

Change

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“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”
― Viktor E. Frankl

I think this quote speaks to me. I can’t change the fact that I have Endometriosis or fertility issues but it does not mean I can not live a Healthy life!!! Life is what you make it. Sending positive vibes to you all xo